Okay, I haven't been feeling well lately (always some excuse, right?) so what did I do this weekend? Caught up on the first three episodes of Bravo's new "reality" offering NYC Prep. It's no secret that I love me some Gossip Girl so even though I didn't want to watch this somewhat odious yet undeniably grossly fun exploration into the lives of rich teens in New York, I JUST COULDN'T HELP MYSELF!
The show has a sunny cast of characters, a veritable who's who in the New York teen social scene...not really.
There's dreamy Sebastian, the 16 year old lothario of East Hampton who has a wingman with whom he sends signals to by flipping his ridiculous 70s hair. He speaks French poorly and hooks up with lots of girls (between two and 16 a month!) even though he chews gum with his mouth open.
Kelli, also 16, lives in Manhattan with her 18 year old brother and no parental supervision. Oh wait, her mother and father come in from the Hamptons one night a week, which proves they really care. She wants to be a singer. She lurvs Sebastian, but he only has eyes for...
Taylor, the 15 year old pride of the Upper West Side. And she goes to... stage whisper... public school. Of course, they only mention briefly that she goes to a public school that's nicer than many privates and is one of the best in the city. Stuyvesant is a magnet that you have to test into so even though she plays the role of the dumb brunette (hrm), she actually has a brain in there despite the fact that every other sentence she utters includes the word "social status." In fact, she's a bit wily as she seems to be playing everyone including...
Camille, 17, the mini-Blair Waldorf -- down to the hairband -- who attends Nightingale-Bamford and desperately desperately wants to go to Harvard (though she's written since this proclamation that what she really meant was "the idea of Harvard").
It's all over the internets that none of these kids actually go to top tier prep schools because surely no Brearley or Spence girls would be caught dead flaunting their wealth and looking like bitches on a gauche TV show. However, we're supposed to believe with all our little hearts that these cardboard cutouts are a fine representation of what real upper echelon city kids are like. But wait... isn't that what Gossip Girl is for?
Lest you think we're stuck in bourgeoisie hell, we do have a billionaire's grandson in the form of... PC (pictured), 18, the Dwight graduate and possibly gay offspring of Blackstone Senior Chairman Peter Peterson (seriously). In fact, PC is also named Peter Peterson. Peter Carey Peterson. I think he should be called PCP, don't you? All of PC's scenes seem to be propelling us to the foregone conclusion that he likes boys and not his best friend...
Jessie. Oh Jessie. Also a recent Dwight graduate, Jessie is the future Alexis Carrington Colby of the group (although future Real Housewife of NYC is more like it). She's ambitious, snooty and mean. I so want to hate her, but these shortcomings are so obviously a desperate attempt to mask her other shortcomings... and that is putting it politely. Jessie loves PC but alas, I think those feelings need to sink with the sun never to see the light of day again because it's just not gonna happen.
Having said this, they will probably end up unhappily married spending days where he throws water bottles at her (or expensive vodka once he's of age, haha, like these kids care about the drinking age!), and she slaps him across the face. Both of these situations have occurred on the show. PC also told a girl he was going to break his beer bottle on her head if she didn't leave him alone when they were in Mexico. Such a charmer!! He's no Chuck Bass, that's for sure.
It's painful at times how obviously set up the scenes are and seeing the kids play dress up at fancy dinner parties and clubs in their mini-adult frocks and dinner jackets is pretty cringeworthy for the most part. They often sneak glances at the cameras and seem to stumble on lines.
However, I don't just watch this show for the schadenfreude... New Yorker Big Word Alert!... I watch it to hear great lines like this one in re Jessie's charity work that Camille is trying to glom onto so she can go to Harvard: "In the Operation Smile world, Jessie is the queen bee."
Omigod. Like, that is SO TRUE!!
Oh wait, there was also the time where Sebastian told Kelli, "That's what like the movies are for. The Jewish people." Why are movies for the Jewish people, you ask? Because they need something to do on Christmas, of course!!!!
Cameo of tonight's ep: Taylor Momsen... looking confused... as to why someone was filming her.
Thank God the season finale is next week.
(photo at Bravotv.com)
That's sad to hear they're staging them in uncomfortable semi-adult BS milieux. On Laguna Beach (at least seasons 1-2) the fake actors just did a bunch of boring teenage stuff. They seemed to spend a lot of time trying on goofy clothes and drinking out of red plastic cups while someone's parents were out.
ReplyDeleteHope the whole reality show thing helps that one kid get into Harvard, at least. Who needs Operation Smile when you have Bravo?