Recipe For An Excellent Drive - That's Not My Name

Goodness, what a day it's been with Balloon Boy capturing our attention and all. Now it turns out he was hiding in the attic the whole time the Jiffy Pop flying thingamajig his father made was floating over Colorado.

I was sitting in the dentist's chair when the story broke and I watched, transfixed, as the nice lady poked around my mouth. Good times.

Anyway, that's not why I'm here... a week after my last post. I really am terrible, but in my defense I was stuck in Sidekick hell. More about that in my upcoming column... err.. two weeks from now. Now I'm in Blackberry purgatory. It's an okay place to be but quite a change after six years of loyalty to a device that, as it turns out, had its head in the clouds.

I drove home today with the windows down, the seat heater on (it is 50 degrees out after all) and "That's Not My Name" blasting on the stereo.

The Ting Tings - New Music - More Music Videos

Of course here's another song I just heard recently (way too late to the game as usual). Even Tom's heard it and everything. He said they played a show with The Ting Tings in Australia.

I think I've documented my penchant for flying up 71 while pretending I'm in a music video or something. There's something very un-self conscious about rocking out in your cocoon. I'm addicted to the V8 (engine, not the drink), I admit. It's appalling behavior for a Springhurst Housewife to put the pedal to the metal, I'm sure, but it's superfun blowing them all away as some fun part of me that no one ever sees takes center stage for the 20 minute drive home.

Playlist - Melancholy Wednesday Edition

I like coming up with random new features while sitting in my office staring out the window contemplating my afternoon sojourn to Bed, Bath and Beyond.

So... yes... here's three songs I've listened to today. I'm feeling mildly melancholy for no apparent reason. Probably depression due to Tom DeLay dropping out of Dancing with the Stars. I'm bereft, I tell ya.



Yes, Oasis seem like jerks to the highest degree, but I quite like this song. Not sure how I feel about listening to it while watching Liam lip synch in a desert, though... or wherever he is.



Every time I lament the return of the 90s I hear a song that takes me back to my early 20s and I start to wonder what I did with my babydoll dresses and Doc Martens. Ahh, the joys of Matthew Sweet. I resisted Girlfriend for a long time but then I finally gave in and listened on repeat for days that stretched into endless weeks of looking at the sun.



I remember going to see Luna at the El Rey in Los Angeles. It's one of the few concerts I've been to where I stood right up front and got all swoony. Later I made Sean, the guitarist, be my friend. It's hilarious to see him with long hair. I hadn't before I found this video just now. I even got the briefest of mentions in Dean Wareham's memoir. Of course I bought it, looked for my name and never read the rest. Ha... err.. ha.

Okay, this day is far too pleasant for me to be committed to prose.

Dancing With The Stars - At Least I'm Told They're Stars...

So... my mother came for a visit recently and like most visits with my mother we spent a large amount of time arguing about politics and religion. Somewhere in there she lamented the fact that we don't have a lot of common ground and cited our difference in tv watching as an example - I watch So You Think You Can Dance and she watches Dancing with the Stars.

Well, here I am mending fences and once again subjecting myself to the scariness that is DWTS. I will argue that SYTYCD is a superior show because everyone on it can actually dance. Also, the problem with DWTS is that I recognize more of the ballroom dancers than the supposed celebs! However, DWTS is a much easier abbreviation than SYTYCD.

It's interesting to see former SYTYCD contestants like Lacey Schwimmer (she needs to cool it with the collagen), Dmitry Chaplin (who still hasn't learned to button his shirts) and Chelsie Hightower (not my favorite then or now) in a different milieu. As far as the "stars" go, it was positively surreal to see Macy Gray up there in week one. Quelle surprise she got the axe. Also eliminated in weeks one and two: Ashley Hamilton and Kathy Ireland. Unbelievably, former House Leader Tom DeLay is still in the running (proving that viewers of this show are my mother x 1,000,000) even though my favorite judge Bruno Tonioli remarked, "You're crazier than Sarah Palin!"

Yes, I have a favorite judge because before tonight I've actually watched this show a few times. I think I followed most of the Kristi Yamaguchi season (Asian power!).

It's Rumba/Samba night and the ladies are lookin' scary! I mean, I get that ballroom is sort of larger than life but man, who does the makeup for these poor girls? Melissa Joan Hart looks like a 1980s porn star! And they're all orange!

Okay, who is Louie Vito? Does anyone know? Apparently he's a snowboarder. Does ABC really think avid snowboarding fans are the target audience for this show?

Every good reality competition needs a snooty British judge and Len Goodman is no fan of anyone tonight as all have fallen in his estimation while Carrie Ann Inaba tries to spread the love.

At this point the show has way too many contestants I've never heard of and this is the reason you're being spared a play by play. Also, I need to go walk the dogs. Be right back...

Okay, the poochies are exercised and Donny Osmond is about to rumba... or samba... or something with his plastic surgeried face. Is now a good time to talk about how much I loved Donny & Marie when I was a kid? I have a picture of me from 1977 hanging out on the Jersey shore wearing my sky blue D&M t-shirt and sporting a Dorothy Hamill haircut. God, I was so freakin' cool. Anyway, Donny appears to be having an affair with Bruno and after fake making out with him proclaims, "They're not going to let me back in Utah anymore!" He gets the highest all around praise, but not scores (those went to Mya).

Hey, we're talking about man love so let's show the two gay dudes from Modern Family! They're in the audience! Huzzah!

Paula Abdul's here, too, talking about how Donny Osmond is delusional. Pot, kettle, etc etc. That lady bought a one way ticket to Bonkertown and hasn't been heard from since.

Some grouchy dude who looks like he must be this year's football player performs a samba. Michael Irvin is his name and samba's not really his game. I really don't understand this show. Two hours of mediocre dancing? How is this fun? Is it me? What am I missing, people?

Holy cow, somewhere Phil Collins is barfing over this milquetoasty version of "In The Air Tonight." At least I hope he is. This band is making me sad. They're not even trying, are they? Anyway, PC butchering aside, everyone loves Natalie Coughlin. She's a swimmer. Yeah...

Oh my goodness... Chuck Liddell... wow.

They just showed Aaron Carter dancing with Donny Osmond. I think Donny has a closet to come out of or something. As for Aaron Carter... was he a Backstreet Boy? Or the brother of one? Either way, he's wearing a translucent bathrobe and wants to do a rumba that comes "straight from the heart." If straight from the heart means almost falling over, then yes, he was successful.

This Tom DeLay bit is just... this makes the last two hours all worthwhile. Tom's not a quitter and even though he's a crooked politician I find myself feeling these strange stirrings of respect for the man who will not give up even though he has stress fractures in both feet and dances like a robot. He's shaking his hips and you can see him counting the beat and gosh darnit if it's not just a little bit cute.

So, this is what Dancing with the Stars will do to you... turn you into a republican sympathizer. Watch at your own risk.

What I'm Listening to Right This Very Second - Jumbo

Have I talked about how much I love Underworld? I saw them at Coachella one year and for days after I still felt high. So, err, you can love them, too. Start here with "Jumbo."

It's fall which means I officially have zero problems for the next few months. God, I hope I'm not jinxing myself here or anything.

I have no great wisdom to impart today, but when do I ever? Seriously, my life right now is all about sitting on my deck reading paper shaped like books and staring off into the trees.

I may try to return tonight with some, err, blogging about "Dancing With the Stars." We'll see...

In the meantime, click you disconnect from me.