Stephen Colbert, I Heart You

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I sort of hate that I hate Sarah Palin because I feel like I'm just playing into her hands. She and Rush Limbaugh feed off our disdain like it's manna from heaven.

What kind of person snidely derides hope and change as if they are ridiculous notions, to be mocked at every turn?

I saw a bumper sticker recently that read, "Not My Fault." It had the Obama logo as the "o" in "not." This person obviously voted for Bush, so I would say yeah, the situation we're currently in is your fault. The responsibility belongs to all of us, actually, for forgetting about accountability for the last eight years, for refusing to work with each other and reducing politics to pithy one liners. I say it for both sides, I include myself.

That being said, I still think Sarah Palin is a blight. To follow her and her brainless "lift American spirits" written-on-the-hand rhetoric is to follow a modern day Pied Piper. I hope those who trumpet her as the savior of the conservative/evangelical movement see the river before they reach it.

I think you lift people's spirits by, you know, LIFTING... not by putting others down. But what do I know? I'm so clearly not in the elevating business.

Estaban Colberto es Muy Genio!

I may just have to join Lauren in her Stephen Colbert obsession. This is so brilliant. I'll watch UniMundo anytime!

Adios!
Ms. P

Damn You, James Patterson!

I've been watching Women's Murder Club and kind of enjoying it so I decided to read one of the books. I just finished 1st to Die and I kind of enjoyed it (a theme, you'll notice), but oooh, my little foot is stomping in anger at that ending! *Spoiler Alert, but the book came out five years ago so whatever.* I enjoyed the triple twist, but James, WHY DID YOU KILL CHRIS?! I'm assuming Lindsay goes back to partnering with Jacobi even though if he hadn't left his post (after she pleaded with him to stay there) her boyfriend/future second husband might still be alive. I was baffled that he was comforting her at the funeral because I would have been punching him in the face. Humf. Super humf. But I guess a happily married heroine doesn't make for fine drama. I get that. One other thing that bothered me about the book was how lovey dovey the women were. I have oodles of affection for my girlfriends, but I don't think I'm ruminating about how pretty and wonderful they are every five minutes. Also, I don't know any women in their mid-30s (which I'm assuming is Boxer's age range) who use the word "slacks". Not even back in 2002.

Okay, rant over. I promised newsiness...

Apparently it was a big conspiracy by Barack Obama supporters that kept Stephen Colbert off the Democratic ticket in South Carolina. Really, Barack supporters? Was he that much of a threat?

Rush Limbaugh went after another child today. Or, rather, he attempted to exploit the kid by calling out the Democrats who he said were... exploiting the kid. I try not to wish ill on anyone and frankly, Limbaugh is a waste of time, breath, energy, and words, but if he vanished tomorrow I might not be sad. Ditto Ann "The Man" Coulter. Bill O'Reilly and Sean Hannity may continue to exist. I guess. See, I'm not all bad. Wait. Maybe not Sean Hannity. Gee, this is a tough one.

Here's a handy list of TV shows that might be affected by the WGA strike. I have friends who are out there picketing so all I have to say is "Power to the People!!" Or something inspirational like that. I don't know much about protesting but did come up with some useful slogans for a friend of mine who one day dreams of picketing Heather "Only God Could Orchestrate Me Being Miss America" French Henry.

The initial numbers are in on the Radiohead In Rainbows experiment. I'm actually a little surprised that only 38% of people paid for the record. However, it was pointed out to me at lunch today that even with those numbers they'll still probably make more than what they would with a major label so I guess that's the real bummer. I think my hope is that this potential sales model would make the labels realize that the system, which has been going down in flames for the last several years, needs to rise from the ashes in a new way that benefits everyone a little more. Pie meet sky, right?

Lastly, apparently the Ten Commandments have been posted in the Capitol Rotunda. Please tell me we have a new gov. However, the last laugh will probably be on me as watch, Beshear will keep the display up, even though we know from those wonderful commercials that he worked hard to keep them out of the schools!

They've found another planet,
Ms. P

ps. I just turned on House and oh boy! The opening song is "One Big Holiday"! I knew they were using it but didn't realize it would air so soon. Does this mean I can meet Hugh Laurie? And steal his fork? My Morning Jacket and House. Neato!

Make Me Over, Oprah!

I have a new celebrity crush. Ted Gibson, hairstylist to the stars, is sooo adorable! I haven't seen a man wear pink so well in ages.

I'm watching 100 women get new haircuts courtesy of Oprah. For the most part the transformations are pretty amazing (and Ms. O even cut Hilary Swank's hair), but the woman who comes out with the Carol Brady 'do and says she now feels fabulous. Not too sure about that one. And there are a lot of heavy bangs going on. Did you know they call bangs "fringe" in England? When I was on tour with doves we had about a day's worth of fun trying to sort that one out. Anyway, I must confess I have a total weakness for makeover shows and I'm sad that the original What Not to Wear isn't on anymore (even though their hair and makeup fixes were always a bit suspect). I miss Trinny and Susannah!

I would love for Oprah's celebrity hair peeps to get hold of me but now my hair is short and pink so I really don't know what else they could do (well, maybe not Ken Paves. He sort of scares me, and I don't want to end up looking like a Jessica Simpson hairpiece.. Also, Tom's sister does my hair, and she's the best). Everyone's going to laugh at me when I go back to work next week, but I live to bring comedy to my pals. I'm just like the Man of Smiles in The Legend of Zelda: The Phantom Hourglass!

OMG! The Osmonds reunite next week on Oprah! There's a picture of me floating around out there from 1977 and I have on my sky blue Donny & Marie t-shirt and am sporting a Dorothy Hamill haircut. I saw The Osmonds on tour at the Cotton Bowl in Dallas. I am a huge, huge dork and now I can't wait to revel, once again, in all their Mormon glory.

In other news...

Stephen Colbert didn't make it onto the Democratic ticket in South Carolina. Don't worry, I'm sure he'll make it on the Repub's. Insert "not" joke here.

Britney Spears' monthly expenses are $49,267. Oof! I don't make that in a year! I didn't know tanning in Bel Air and being stupid cost that much!

Inside Edition is featuring David Copperfield's pickup techniques tonight. That's not tacky or anything.

I'm sure you've all heard about Duane "Dog" Chapman's racist rant at his son. Well, it turns out the jerk doesn't fall far from the tree as said son is the one who leaked it to the press! I'd never even heard of this guy until this happened and I hope I can go back to never hearing of him again. And I hope they don't let him keep the "dog" name as it's an insult to pooches everywhere. Yet another racist white dude with bad hair is outed to the world. Tee hee, I say.

OK, phone call. Back later,
Ms. P